Sunday, July 18, 2010

The New Normal.

What has been normal for the past 18 months or so has been for me to do what little I can, while I can and then spend the rest of my time recuperating from that minimal effort. Now that I'm getting better rest once more, I find myself floundering a little. In some ways it's like I'm starting again in regards to healthy habits. I feel as if I'm learning all over again how to run a household, and since Kiddlywink has only seen me not well, it's almost like we're going back to her being a newborn again in regards to getting her and myself on some sort of schedule.

The kicker of it is, I don't have that rosy glow I used to get when I was still in diet mentality. You know what I mean, that first flush of excitement as you plot and plan your daily meals; the virtuous smile you get when you spot someone else "doing it wrong"; the rush of watching the first few pounds drop off in a matter of weeks. These days it's not a rush, more of a plod. I can't be arsed weighing/measuring any scrap of food, let alone every morsel, especially when I'm preparing meals for Kiddlywink as well.

In fact, it's preparing her meals that has made eating healthy feel real to me in a way it hasn't done in a long time. Last week, Alaskaboy and I had a fit of the lazies. When we were almost to the end of the week, it dawned on me that Kiddlywink had been eating from our plates, as is her wont, and she'd had a more unbalanced diet as a result. Then, horrified, I realised her actual meals had also been pretty piss poor because we hadn't been paying attention to what she'd eaten over the course of the day. We'd gone for what was easiest to let us continue being lazy.

The last few days I've concentrated on bringing up her nutrition levels, while ensuring I ate at least one healthy-ish meal per day. To simplify things a little for me since I didn't have the brain power right then to concentrate on my food as well as hers, there were also two days I tried following a meal plan from one of my low fat cookbooks. Even eating intuitively, I had eaten my "allowed" amount within eight hours of getting up. One, the calorie count is too low for me at the moment, and two, I'd snookered myself because it's PMS week.

So, the upshot of it all is, I'm trying to figure how to get us to a new normal. Slightly more scheduled days are better for a toddler. Intuitiveness is well and good, but it must also be tempered by a certain amount of scheduling. Am hoping our normal will eventually involve daily exercise, a few outings per week to prevent cabin fever, some form of housework/tidying per day, and more healthy home cooked meals than convenience products. Even, dare I say, some writing time could be in my future!

That's the bitch of it all, trying to find a workable, moderate solution that I can keep doing every day. Am hoping to get a fair bit of this sorted out before Kiddlywink grows out of her bouncer. That's gonna be a whole other challenge, getting her to fall asleep in her cot/crib.

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