Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Advice needed.

As I mentioned at the bottom of yesterday's post; we're seriously thinking about starting a family later this year. Since making that decision I've alternated between thrilled and terrified. Thrilled because we really want this and are mentally and emotionally ready for this stage in our relationship. (In fact we'd go now if I wasn't wanting to recover a little more.) Scared because, well, most people are scared about taking this step. What ups the ante into terrified is my health.

Our gyno says "all systems are go" in regards to my reproductive organs and he didn't even mention my weight, but I'm worried about the rest of me. Firstly, I can't imagine how uncomfortable any significant weight gain is going to be on top of the actual baby's mass. There's no guarantees I won't put on 25-50+ pounds. That much extra weight on a body that is still possibly not fully recovered from antibiotic poisoning, plus nearly a year without any significant exercise, means I'm scared.

Funny thing is, a lot of this intuitive eating and exercise for the last couple of years has been geared towards having a baby, yet here I am nearly back up to my highest weight and physically the least fit I've ever been. VERY frustrating lemme tell you. Point in favour is the emotional fitness, but come on it's the body that does most of the work when pregnant. And the loose tendons and ligaments that can occur? Holy shit is that making me almost sick with fear at the thought of that on top of the weakness from the quinolones.

The medical establishment doesn't help matters. "Is best to lose some weight before getting pregnant...but don't diet." GRRRRR. I don't know if this is based on medical fact or is the fat bias that is so often seen with doctors.

Bottom line is I'm feeling the tick of the clock, both biological(Why aren't we already pregnant?) and chronological (You turn 32 this year and he turns 37, c'mon, c'mon, time's a-wasting!) Yet I'm really not sure how to approach this. Ideally, I'd love another twelve months to recover and build up my fitness and health. . .but as we've seen shit happens. And we don't want to wait another twelve months.

Any thoughts?

6 Nibbles:

Marshmallow said...

I have no desire whatsoever to have kids, so I don't even know why I'm responding to this post - all I want to say is best of luck, whatever you decide to do.

Kada said...

Thanks! That means a lot, especially since you're not in the least interested in the subject. :)

Erin said...

If your doctor says you are good to go to carry the baby then I say don't worry about the weight factor so much, but speaking from my one experience, you will be extremely tired and need all the fitness you can muster. I know you have been struggling with getting back into exercise after your ordeal (understandably)but I think you should at least get back in to walking or swimming regularly or something before you start trying. Waiting for a magical time though never works, do what your heart says is right on this one.
You could have morning sickness and hardy gain anything! Not that I wish that on you, but seriously I have known women above "normal" weight (by med standards) to have healthy pregnancies and to only gain about 15 lbs which is completely safe.

kathrynoh said...

I didn't put on weight when I was pregnant - because I was overweight, I actually lost weight as I gained baby!

You definitely can't be too fit - the fitter you are, the easier it will be during the pregnancy and birth.

Good luck :D

Kada said...

Thanks Erin and Kathryn! Looks like I'll be upping the exercise and making sure my nutrition is pretty good from now on.

Juliet said...

I'd worry a lot less about your weight and more about building strength. Do you swim at all? I know if you're weak, water exercises are really helpful.

If the doctor has given the green light, go for it. I know from personal experience that getting pregnant is not as easy as everyone makes it out to be. We tried for over a year and I've known resigned myself to being childless. If it happens, great... but I don't expect it to.

I had a known fertility issue, but there can always be problems you don't know about, too. Infertility is common, which is why I'd say try ASAP... there's no reason you can't work out while trying to get pregnant.

If you're not already, start taking a prenatal vitamin even if you aren't going to try just yet. If you take it in advance, it helps better prepare the body. Just an FYI.